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Excerpt

When a man is able to identify the right female companion for whom he has great enthusiasm and passion, he has the potential to forge a wonderful love filled relationship that brings years of happiness, fun, romance and deep seeded friendship. Being able to identify and approach your dream girl, gauge your compatibility with her, and grow a relationship that brings mutual fulfillment to both you and her can come naturally as you learn to master your relationships.

It is commonplace for men to complain that they do not understand women. Most men have expressed this sentiment at one time or another. When men express such a sentiment it is a manifestation of the confusion they experience when linking their assumptions about women compared with the behavioral attributes they observe in women when engaged in interpersonal relationships. Women conveniently use this confusion and perpetuate the myth that women are very complex and intricate while men are very shallow and simple. Such a societal myth allows women to act without accountability. When acting in a manner that is hurtful, harmful, manipulative, or inconsiderate to their male companion, they can always use the women are complex and intricate myth for cover. From a woman’s point of view, why not?

In reality, the holistic makeup of human behavior in both men and women is complex. There is a complex dynamic interchange between conscious and subconscious thought that drives behavior. In spite of these complexities, both men and women are driven by powerful primordial instincts that have evolutionary roots which have been under development for thousands of years. These primordial instincts are powerful drivers for behavior in both men and women. Because men and women are equipped with different attributes for survival, the primordial behavioral drivers are different. If men can get one thing out of this book it is to understand that the primordial behavioral drivers for women are different from those of men. Understanding these drivers is the key to being able to predict, or at least understand, how women will react or behave under different circumstances. Knowledge is power.

This book will introduce the Thirteen Steps to help you master your interpersonal relationships with women. This book is designed for young men in the dating phase of life to experiment with the Thirteen Steps and use them as a means to better understand women and how they will react or behave under a variety of circumstances. Men will learn to gain control over their relationships by understanding how women will react to different impulses. In addition, men will learn the virtues of being a man and how to take accountability their own actions. Only through practice can men gain confidence in managing their relationships. As young men navigate the dating landscape, they will inevitably encounter many different women. The Thirteen Steps will help you take control of your relationships and make the best with whomever you are dating. Men cannot learn to fully trust until they appreciate the nature of women and gain an understanding and expectation of their behavioral characteristics. The Thirteen Steps are intended to give men that understanding, and when you meet your dream girl you will have the confidence and knowledge to develop a long lasting and loving relationship with her. The Thirteen Steps are not intended to be used as a vehicle for manipulation. Long term relationships can only be established on a solid foundation of love and trust.

Young men who enter into dating need to know that among many wonderful young ladies, there are many that aim to set traps and use men for personal gain or convenience. Such behavior is ugly and banal and is not to be ignored or glossed over. Many women who engage in such behavior do not typically consider their actions to be objectionable because society has taught them that women are good and men are bad. The Thirteen Steps will help men to recognize such women and how to identify and avoid traps. This work is aimed at helping men to understand their own true nature and gain a solid appreciation of who they are and embrace their differences from women. As men implement and experiment with the Thirteen Steps in their relationships over a number of years, they will grow their self-confidence and learn how to identify a potential long term partner who can satisfy their needs. Until a man gains self-confidence in dealing with women, he is not ready for a lifelong partner.

Another category of men who can benefit from the Thirteen Steps are recently separated or divorced men who are looking to re-enter the dating scene. Such men are prime targets for women who seek to prey off of men. These groups of men are particularly vulnerable because they have recently experienced the trauma of a failed relationship with a woman. In many instances, the trauma involves a female partner who continually berates her male partner by verbalizing to him that he is inadequate, is a failure, is not a good man, cannot meet her needs, is inconsiderate, is lazy, is selfish, is a Neanderthal, etc... Just because a woman thinks such thoughts does not make them true. However, after living in a poisoned environment for a length of time, it is typical to lose confidence and subconsciously begin to believe the negative thoughts that float around such an environment. The problem is compounded by the fact that divorced or separated men quite often are well established and have significant assets for unscrupulous women to pursue.

One of the biggest mistakes that recently separated or divorced men make is to believe that they need to get into another committed relationship that will lead to marriage. The reason for this misconception is that these men have been in marriage for a period of time. They do not visualize themselves in anything but such a relationship. Furthermore, their self-confidence is usually broken, and a committed relationship provides an ego boost and a familiar setting that initially feels very soothing. Recently divorced or separated men should avoid jumping into another committed relationship until they have extensively dated and learn to understand what kind of woman they need and how to identify that woman. The Thirteen Steps will help men repair their egos, regain self-confidence, and learn to discriminate between women who are genuine and those who make a habit of using men. Again, it is important to emphasize that the art of truly grasping the Thirteen Steps requires considerable practice—knowledge through practice. Men who engage in the Thirteen Steps will develop a self-awareness like they have never before experienced. As this self-awareness develops they may decide that marriage is not what they seek from new relationships. Or they may decide that marriage is precisely what they seek in a long term committed relationship. The point is that men need to know what they want and how to get it. With knowledge of the Thirteen Steps, men will be empowered to approach marriage with confidence to develop a loving and passionate relationship that brings with it health, happiness, and a life filled with love and companionship.